Sunday, August 26, 2007

Welcome to Middled!

This blog is supposed to keep me alive in St. Louis, Missouri. I moved back from St. Petersburg, Russia two weeks ago. I had a decent job slangin’ English to industrial pipe producers. I had a wonderful girlfriend and a steady diet that sanctioned copious mayonnaise consumption. I had friends and work-appropriate clothing, and yet I made the decision to leave.

The reasons for my departure were simple, but hard to accept and act upon. I was worried about careers that I didn’t have and I wanted to be home. I had applied to graduate writing programs in December and was rewarded for my efforts and lusterless GRE scores with a round of rejections. I was upset at first, but came to believe that this was intended (obviously not by me) and that strolling through the void, rather than a campus would somehow serve me better. It’s an odd thing to be living in Russia, faced with the prospect of returning to Missouri, and to run into questions like, “How can I give up my comfortable life? How can I go somewhere so unknown?”

My family has helped me feel better about this decision. The pain of separating from Natasha has not. I feel very anxious about living in this city, isolated from the majority of my friends who are making their way in more diverse, happening settings. I don’t intend for this blog to focus on my alone time in my apartment (a place that still lives in fantasy while I live at home). I’d rather make this a forum for discoveries as well as encounters with forgotten or underappreciated people, foods, recreation and wonders, all somehow connected to these Middle West states.

I know that my readership will mostly consist of my parents and a few bored friends, but I write this for the world. Rise up Mid-West! Give me some damn hope!

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